OMG Tomorrow's the Day

So, I don't really know how it got to be the day before. Time flies. We got a call from the admission center saying that our check in time (I am pretending we are going away on some exotic adventure) is going to be at 3:00 PM. Anyone who knows me knows that this sucks. I would much rather go at the crack of dawn so that I can start the process and not dwell on it all day. But it is what it is. Kenyon is the best husband ever and ran me a bath last night filled with eucalyptus bubbles to try and relax me. It worked. And then panic set in. I started thinking about the moment we leave the hospital. See, I've never been one to worry about being IN the hospital because we have so much help and back up. It's that moment that they hand you the discharge papers and you are on your way. And then I take him home. And I have to worry about him eating the right stuff on my watch. Then I started thinking about how sick he will be. And how he might puke a lot. Or how he will be fighting me to drink olive oil. Or perhaps he will just lay there with IVs in him hating on me.  Yes, it is time to panic. I really try to focus on what will come out of it. Hopefully we will have a kid who is seizure and med free. Maybe not right away but down the road. That is the only thing holding me together from having a major panic attack. #whateverittakes